Wife hating her father-in-law

Question 8: I have a wife who lives in a separate house away from my parents whom she deeply hates. She does not even like them to come to the house. It should be noted that she has four children. When my parents visit me, she does not serve them. It is I who serve them food, which I actually buy from restaurants, make them coffee, and prepare their beds. I do not let them feel my wife’s dislike for them. When they ask me about her, I tell them that she and I had a quarrel. I do not want them to feel that she hates them.

Please advise me. What should I do as regards my parents, this wife, and the children who are torn between their motherand me? Since I do not want to offend my wife, I would like to give her advice through your Fatwaa’ (legal opinion issued by a qualified Muslim scholar). I will give the Fatwaa’ to one of her brothers to read it to her as she is illiterate. Al-salaamu `alaykum warahmatullaah wabarakaatuh (May Allaah’s Peace, Mercy, and Blessings be upon you)

Answer: Both the spouses should fear Allah (Glorified and Exalted be He) and do their duties towards each other in kindness. They should both be kind to their in-laws in order to create intimacy and become a close-knit family. Allaah (Exalted be He) says: …and live with them honourably. He (Glorified be He) also says… read more here.

Wife’s kindness to the parents-in-law as an act of good companionship

Question 7: Is it the husband’s right that his wife should treat his parents kindly and be dutiful to them even if they are not Muslims? It should be noted that they live in a separate apartment away from his family and she visits them occasionally. We appreciate your advice. May Allaah reward you best.

Answer: A Muslim woman is required to treat people kindly, whether they are in-laws or anyone else, and this is highly stressed when it comes to her husband’s parents because this strengthens the marital bond and helps the husband express dutifulness to his parents… read more here.