Question 45: I got married two years ago and I am still a student. I have been living with my family since then. I gave birth to a baby. However, I sometimes feel that I hate my husband and I keep telling myself that I should not and will not think this way, but I always return to the same idea, then regret afterwards, but to no avail. My question is: What should I do with my husband? It should be mentioned that he does not annoy me in any way, except if I am the one who makes the first move.
Answer: You should fear Allaah (Exalted be He), strive against yourself, and be a good companion to your husband. You should also guard his honor, money, and children, and fulfill all his duties. In order to do this, you should first seek Allaah’s Support, and then be patient, observe Salaah (Prayer), recite the Qur’aan, and say Adkaar (invocations and remembrances said at certain times on a regular basis) that are authentically reported from the Messenger of Allaah (peace be upon him)... read more here.
Question 35: Is it permissible for a wife to refuse having sexual intercourse with her husband when he desires it? What is the ruling if she refuses merely out of stubbornness?
Answer: It is not permissible for a wife to disobey her husband when he wishes to be intimate with her except for a Shar`ee (Islaamically lawful) reason, such as menstruation. It is related in the Two Saheeh (authentic) Books of Hadeeth (i.e. Al-Bukhaaree and Muslim) on the authority of Aboo Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) who narrated that the Messenger of Allaah (peace be upon him) said... read more here.
Question 29: What are a wife’s rights over her husband and a husband’s rights over his wife?
Answer: The basic rule regarding the mutual rights and duties between spouses is the statement of Allaah (Exalted be He): And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) according to what is reasonable, but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them. And Allaah is All-Mighty, All-Wise. The Prophet (peace be upon him) also said.. read more here.
Question 7: What is the ruling on a wife who denies her husband his marital rights; by refusing to have sexual relations with him despite being healthy and without any Shar`ee (Islaamically lawful) excuse? What is the ruling on someone who tries to provoke the spouses against each other, if they are from amongthe wife’s relatives?
Answer: First, a wife must obey her husband when he calls her to his bed, and it is Haraam (prohibited) for her to refuse without a Shar`ee excuse. It was authentically reported in the Two Saheeh (authentic) Books of Hadeeth (Al-Bukhaaree and Muslim) and other books on the authority of Aboo Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace be upon him) said: “If a husband calls his wife to his bed (to have sexual relation) and she refuses and lets him sleep while angry, the angels will curse her until the morning.” In another narration, the Messenger of Allaah (peace be upon him) said… read more here.